MEN-opause MEN-strual pain MEN-tal illness GUY-necologist HIS-terectomy. Ever notice how all of our problems start with MEN?
It’s important to find a man who has money, a man who adores you, a man who is great in the sack. But the most important thing is that these 3 men should never meet…
Men are like Bluetooth – They are connected to you when you are nearby, but search for other devices when you are away! Women on the other hand are like Wi-Fi. They see all available…
God spoke to Adam: GOD: Adam – first, the good news! I have given you a brain & a penis. ADAM: Wow, thanks God!! Now… what’s the bad news? GOD: You have only enough blood…
Men are like diapers, always full of poo.
God made men cause vibrators can’t buy drinks.
What’s a man’s idea of cleaning the bathroom? Flushing the toilet.
Some say men are like playing cards. All it takes is the ladies…. you need a …………….. a HEART to love Them. a DIAMOND to marry them a CLUB to beat them and …….
Men are only on this earth because vibrators can’t buy you drinks.
How many men does it take to do the dishes? I don’t know but I will let you know when it happens.
A man went over to his girl’s place for a little bit of nookie between the sheets. He presented her with three choices of condom — gold, silver, or bronze. Silver, she said. Why not…
Why can’t men get mad cow disease? Because they’re all pigs.
Why do little boys whine? Because they are practicing to be men.
Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating? To stop the snoring before it starts.
What’s a man’s idea of honestly in a relationship? Telling you his real name.
What is the difference between men and women? A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
Why were men given larger brains than dogs? So they wouldn’t hump women’s legs at cocktail parties.
What do you have whan you have two little balls in your hand? A man’s undivided attention.
Why do men want to marry virgins? Because men can’t stand criticism.
What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
What do you call a man with half a brain? Gifted.
Q:Why are Catholic Men like Amtrak trains? A: They never pull out in time!
Men….can’t live with ’em, can’t sell ’em for parts.
Men are like grapes. You have to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you’d like to have dinner with.